"You're just so sexy, I couldn't help myself" Is not a compliment. It is a threat. And these days, I don't Take so kindly to Being threatened.
Because when I said "No, don't do that" I did not mean to say "Yes, please continue, I'm enjoying this. I'm a woman, and I Don't know what I want, Or what I'm saying; I like role playing without Ground rules or safe words; And I love walking into a Park with a man I don't know Very well and ending up an Assault victim."
That was not the intention Of my communication.
And I'm starting to wonder How many college-aged Women in would take to Flip a light switch in your Brain, to make it so we are Speaking the same language.
It seems to me you might be Lacking a little education - So allow me to assist you In that department.
Lesson One: Consent is not a line on a Form that you sign and give Away and once the pen is Down its over and done.
Consent is an ongoing Process in which people Actively choose to pay attention To each other, Do I have your attention?
If in fact, you are looking to play Parts in some expired drama There are a few safety words I will insist on using;
Take note:
For example, There is NO way I'm ever Going out with you again, so You can put those fantasies back On the shelf because I DON'T Date men who openly profess their Inability to take responsibility For their own actions and I DO expect my lovers to respect me And to know that my body Remains at all times my property, No matter what we are currently Doing together andTHAT Is non-negotiable.
See, when I said "No, don't do that," What I meant to say was "NO! DON'T! DO! THAT!"
And I guess I just expected you To take my word for it.
~CRH September 2012
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